New in Theaters Review: Cloverfield

Cloverfield Poster1-18-08….More than 6 months ago this date was the only information we had on a movie that was going to have the Statue Of Liberty’s head decapitated. In later months the secrecy was deepened, when the writer offered only the name “Cloverfield” as the name that was on the screenplay. A name he said was from the town he grew up in, thus adding even more anticipation as to what this movie was about. We knew it was a monster, from the path of destruction it left, on the posters image. What we didn’t know was what type of monster it was. Well, we all got to find out this weekend, when “Cloverfield” opened at the theaters. Let me be the first to tell you that the monster is this movie itself. It ate my hard earned cash, and I felt violated afterwards. I should have known, when most of the hype was just over the poster alone. Yeah the poster was awesome, a headless Statue Of Liberty, a path of destruction leading into the city from the waterfront. This has to be a great monster movie, look at the poster. Well this is a perfect example of not “judging a book by it’s cover”. This movie sucked in so many ways, I actually wished the writers strike had started before it was written, therefore preventing it’s release all together.

First of all it’s starless, so you won’t recognize anyone, that is except for T.J.Miller who plays “Hud”, our video documentor through the movie’s events. He actually is on a show called “Carpoolers” on ABC. I hope he wasn’t using this movie to further his career. The whole movie is filmed by “Hud” through a camcorder. Now the whole nights events are supposed to have transpired in a seven hour period. In this movie these people jump around Manhattan, like it’s a 20 block island. There is no way they could have done all that they did in 7 hours. This camcorder they used must have had “Super Charged Lithium” batteries. Nothing is explained in this movie, but I guess the writer didn’t have time for destruction of a city, plus a story to go with it. The movie runs about an hour and 34 mins. The first 20 mins is a party for a character named Rob, who is leaving for Japan. Then the monster comes, and the rest is camcorder running, with an occassional look back at the monster, as it seems to show up where ever these characters run. The movie ends just as it began, me waiting to see a monster destroy the city. I just happened to have my camcorder handy, so I filmed myself running out at the end of this movie, with the credits chasing me. This movie was nothing but hype. The writer and director were more excited about making a movie through the lens of a camcorder, than exactually giving the audience a movie worth watching. Out of 4 Statue Of Liberty heads, I give this movie the 1 Statue’s head that was thrown in the streets in the film.